


Decode

by unholyseraphs (oncharredwings)



Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-18
Updated: 2013-05-18
Packaged: 2017-12-12 06:09:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 886
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/808192
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/oncharredwings/pseuds/unholyseraphs
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Don't read if you haven't watched the Season 8 finale.</p>
    </blockquote>





	Decode

**Author's Note:**

> Don't read if you haven't watched the Season 8 finale.

"I told you that I didn't need your help Cas! You wouldn't listen and now look at what you've _done_." 

Castiel could not bring himself to meet Dean's eyes, so instead he focused on the small desk in the corner of the room. On top papers were scattered carelessly, as if one of the brothers had been rooting through them to find something of importance. A small picture frame adorned the desk on the farthest corner, Castiel could not make out the picture because the glass was dusted and dirty. Clearly, it had not been looked at in a long time. 

"Cas are you listening to me?" Dean demanded. When Castiel did not respond, Dean proceeded to slam his hands down on the table, startling him. "Listen to me when I'm talking to you!" 

Cas nodded weakly, his hands hanging in his lap lifelessly. Not long ago, only two months to be exact, his Grace had been stolen from him and Sam Winchester had come close to death. His brothers and sisters had been cast out of Heaven because he was a fool, and he trusted those around him too easily. He had not had a chance to grieve what had happened to him, not since Dean had been yelling at him, blaming him for what had happened to Sam, to the angels, to Heaven, and to Hell. He had taken Dean's anger and abuse for the last two months because he knew that Dean was right. All of this, was his fault, always his fault. "Dean-" 

"Cas I don't want to hear it. Sammy almost died and then the angels got cast out of freaking Heaven because you decided to follow asshole Metatron. I knew that guy was shady. I just knew it but no one would listen to me. You fucked up man, you fucked up big time." Dean began to pace the length of the room, shaking his head. "You hid the angel tablet and then lost it. If you hadn't lost the angel tablet Cas-" 

"I _know_ Dean!" His voice came across gruffer than he had meant but the last two months had been creeping up on him with a stealthy and tactile control, but now they were washing over him in a final tidal wave. His Grace was gone and he was a human; his brothers and sisters were gone from Heaven because he had disobeyed. Again. Rivulets of crimson were covering his hands, washing over him, to bathe him in the blood that had been spilled because of his foolishness. Castiel finally covered his face in his hands, bending over himself, wishing he could bury himself six feet under. "I know," he said again, his voice lowering to a whisper of defeat. Without his Grace, he felt empty and incomplete; he had watched Metatron rip his power right out of him. Almost as if his wings had been ripped from his body, the pain was so great. But Dean could not know of that pain. 

Or at least, that was what he had told himself when he had found the Winchesters again. In a human fashion, he was starting to show his pain and there was nothing he could to stop it from happening now. As Dean stopped to stare at him, Castiel realized that he was crying, and he could only look up at Dean in pathetic shame. "I'm sorry Dean," he said, his voice full of the emotion that he had been hiding for the last two months. "I know it's my fault…it's…it's always my fault. And I'm sorry. If I hadn't come along, none of this would have ever happened to you or Sam." 

Seeing Cas in the kind of emotional distress that only humans could have made Dean swallow his pride. He had been a hard ass to Castiel because he thought he needed the kick in the ass but now he was kicking his own ass. Of course Castiel was unstable, he was human now. No longer an Angel of the Lord. Of course, admitting that he was wrong for yelling at Castiel was a lot harder than he would like to admit. Dean Winchester did like to be wrong. "Cas…we…we'll get it back. Your Grace. You won't be human forever." Dean slowly went to kneel in front of Cas and even took his hands, squeezing them. "….I'm….I'm sorry, alright? You son of a bitch, I'm sorry I've been hard on you. It wasn't…." Dean chewed on the words he wanted to say before picking back up. "I wasn't being completely fair by blaming you for everything that happened. You were just trying to do something right and make up for what happened. I'm really sorry Cas." 

The tears in Castiel's eyes made Dean hurt, and he only wanted to pull Cas in his arms and not let him go. He didn't realize he was pulling Cas from the chair until he was holding his friend in his arms, even rocking him a little to comfort him. Dean had never been all that good at comforting anyone, except maybe Sam, but he wasn't even sure if he had been good at that. Of course, he also didn't even realize he was kissing Castiel until Cas was kissing him back either….

**Author's Note:**

> I've been listening to the song Decode by Paramore and it is now my official Destiel theme song.


End file.
